Self Defense and Masturbation

Alex, the correct question is, "What are classes they should have offered in my high school and that should have been taught by these two girls?"



Neither I nor this flippin' sweet reader who brought this to my attention know what all the jibber-jabber the chick's talking about really means...but we do know good times when we see it. And this my friends, is good times. The even better news is, this video was originally posted in November of 2006, which means that these chicks are even older now. Even legal-er, if you will.

Seriously, it's best to watch this once with the sound on so you kinda know whats going on, and then watch it the 2nd time on mute so you can get the most out of it. And theeen, when you're all good and educated up, I challenge you all to a weird yet sexy mat wrestling/self defense/gratuitous boob-fest. May the best clueless woman in little-to-no-clothing all greased up and straddling another clueless woman WIN!

And yes, much like lots of the things I post, I think we can all agree that everybody wins in this situation. Even the dude who's looking over your shoulder at work while you try to secretly watch this on your smoke break. Even Edward wins.

And the Winner Is...

It turned into quite a TIGHT (ahem) race, but after 20+ nominees and millions of dozens of votes, your favorite queer chick of the day...with 15 votes...

IS...
http://www.myspace.com/terrajuana


Congratulations Terrajuana!

According to popular vote by women, both lesbian and bisexual, both sober and drunk, both clothed and unclothed (or was that just me?) , you are a catch. You're good times. Treasure this honor for 23hrs and 50 minutes Terrajuana. Hold it tight in your fist.

Mmm....fist....

And thanks to everyone else who entered, and everyone who voted. We'll do this again soon!

Top 10 Gay(ish) Things That Are Rockin' My Socks Right Now

I've been mad busy with the magazine, so I haven't had a chance to tell you guys about a lot of cool things that are happening. Click on any picture to get more information about each thing on the list!

10. My wife in "House Bunny." It's a silly movie, but uh, I'm going to see it today. Won't you join me? Yeah I'm just as surprised as you are that I waited a whole 24 hours before seeing it and wasn't lined up overnight like a Harry Potter premiere.

They're looking at one of me and the wife's homemade sex tapes. Yes, it's that awe-inspiring.

9. Uh Huh Her release their first full-length album "Common Reaction"
*click here to hear/buy*
And check out this highly entertaining episode of "Rock Star Guide to the Universe (Part 1)" that features Leisha, Camila and even an appearance by Linda Perry. The rockdoc is directed by YDLM readers Shae Voyeur and Lauren...Voyeur?

You can see Part 2 on youtube or on Shae's site, linked above.

8. "Itty Bitty Titty Committee" on DVD! I saw it twice last Fall during its West Hollywood screening and loved it. It's good times!
*click to purchase!*

7. Be in Melange Lavonne's new music video! You've seen her on LOGO, now here's your chance to be part of the next chapter in Melange's musical/activist career:
click for more info on the casting call!

6. Girltrash releases 12-episodes as a movie TODAY. Girltrash announced today on myspace that they'd be showing the full 12-episodes as a "movie." To be honest, I don't know if this means we'll be seeing anything new, or just everything pieced together, but I do know that this is the same thing that won at a Hong Kong Gay and Lesbian Film Festival and that hot bitches abound in every scene. So I'll be checking out the page later today to see what (and who) is really goin down...
*Click* I say, click. Good lesbian.

5. Cherry Bomb keeps crankin out new, amazing episodes! If you haven't checked them out yet, prepare to fall in love...one semi-drunk lesbian at a time. *bless*
clique here!

4. Digiromp: the new lesbian crack? I've been called "lesbian crack" before...so hopefully this won't completely take over my title. But damn, I clock more hours on this site per day than I do pervin' on my Mcphee and Rachel Shelley combined. What's up wif 'at??

The video is out of sync...Kodak's my bad...
Click mang...

3. Margaret Cho's NEW VH1 Show! Um...did you guys see it when it premiered last Thursday? It was outta sight! I loved it. I'm sure they're going to repeat a bagillion times, so definitely tune in if you haven't yet.
Click down on it...click down on it...

2. Killola's new cd is available FREE right now! Um, as if these guys couldn't get any cooler, they just released their whole cd for frickin' free. Wowsa! It's bomb, yall. Just click on any song titles below, and get to bustin'. The coolest part? Each track starts out with a little intro from one of the band members. *giggle*


If you were tuning in to my last live webcam chat last week, you might have heard me mention something about how I frequently have crazy threesomes with Lisa and Johnny and how Lisa always sticks her full leg up my vagina to seduce me, while Johnny plays Guitar Hero. Then after we all make passionate love, Lisa kicks me out of bed, throws dollar bills at my chest and tells me to "figure it out" as I weep on the side of the bed. I just wanted to clear something up. I might have fibbed a bit here. Lisa...well...she throws $5 bills at me. She's not as frugal as I made her out to be.


1. The web release of INTERLUDE magazine!! Wow...so much to say...
Read aaaaall about it by clicking here!!!

See the 1st issue of Interlude online right now!

**paid subscribers and single copy buyers who've already paid will be rewarded with something special...thanks SO MUCH to you guys!

Its been a pretty stressful and frustrating couple of weeks over at INTERLUDE. The magazine turned out great, but due to a few reasons that I wont get into here, I wont have hard copies of it for another week and a half!!! This is insane since it'll be like...a whole month after we were supposed to have them out to subscribers and in stores.

I'm ok with it because I know there's nothing I can do and in the grand scheme of things, it'll all work out. But I don't want to disappoint my paid subscribers and single copy buyers, the artists that are in the magazine or other people who were waiting to buy it on newsstands.

So I have this cool way of showing everyone the magazine online. It flips through the pages just like a real magazine and you can zoom and read everything. Before making this public, I did a survey of some readers. I wanted to see from you guys if you thought it would be unfair to release the issue online to everyone, even if they haven't paid for it. After much consideration and a resounding "yeah, show us the magazine!" from 90% of those surveyed, I've decided to make it available starting...now!

I wanna do whats best for YOU guys, so if you paid for an issue or paid for a subscription and you want to contact me personally to discuss this decision, please email me at arlan@thisismyinterlude.com. To reiterate, anyone who paid for a copy will have their copies in a couple of weeks. The magazine itself is printed on beautiful heavy matte paper and will certainly become a collector's item. Everyone can still order a hard copy on the site at thisismyinterlude.com.

Leave a comment and let me know what you think of the first issue!!!! AAAHHH!!!

Step 1: Click below.
Step 2: On the next screen, click on the 3rd tab at the top to "view in fullscreen mode."
Step 3: Click on the arrow buttons to the left and right of the screen to flip through pages.
Step 4: Click on any page to zoom in and read up close and personal.
Step 5: Let me know what you think of the mag by leaving a comment here!
*please keep in mind that the version you're seeing has about 10 errors in it that are fixed in the print edition. danke...

*click*

I've had a few requests for information on becoming an Interlude sponsor, so I thought I'd put it all together and present it here. Its through your efforts that I'm able to keep the indie magazine going, so please pass this on to anyone you think might also be interested. This is perfect for small business owners, execs, entertainers, etc. Prostitutes and buskers are also encouraged to register.

To register for any of these levels, go to this page or email me at interludemagazine@yahoo.com for more info.

To see a demo of the first issue, click here!

To visit the official website, go to www.thisismyinterlude.com
_______________



$1,000
-listed in each issue as member of sponsor panel
-lifelong subscription to the magazine
-annual release party vip invitation featuring special surprise guest(s)
-access to biannual panel discussion


$3,000
-listed in each issue as member of sponsor panel
-lifelong subscription to the magazine
-annual release party vip invitation featuring special surprise guest(s)
-access to biannual panel discussion

+interview someone in one of the next 6 issues - list given each issue of 1 or 2 people, drawing


$5,000
-listed in each issue as member of sponsor panel
-lifelong subscription to the magazine
-annual release party vip invitation featuring special surprise guest(s)
-interview someone in one of the next 6 issues - list given each issue of 1 or 2 people, drawing
-access to biannual panel discussion

+6 quarter-page ads over 6 issues of magazine - can be traded for 3 half page ads over 3 issues or 1 full page in 1 issue.


$10,000
-listed in top position in each issue as member of sponsor panel
-lifelong subscription to the magazine
-annual release party vip invitation featuring special surprise guest(s)
-interview someone in one of the next 6 issues - given priority choice on list
-+6 quarter-page ads over 6 issues of magazine - can be traded for 3 half page ads over 3 issues or 1 full page in 1 issue.
-access to biannual panel discussion

+you and a guest are flown to los angeles where you'll stay at a 4-star hotel in/near west hollywood for 3 nights. My friends and I will take you out for a day/night on the town and you'll hang with me on a photo shoot for the magazine! (time to be determined by all parties' schedules)
___________________

To register for any of these levels, go to this page or email me at interludemagazine@yahoo.com for more info.

To see a demo of the first issue, click here!

To visit the official website, go to www.thisismyinterlude.com

-arlan
founder/editor/publisher
INTERLUDE magazine

Want to be in a Music Video?

Lesbian rapper Melange Lavonne is looking for someone to play her wifey in a new music video she's filming and she asked me to help her find someone:-) Her last video was all over the LOGO network and an internet viral sensation. This is for ladies who are in Los Angeles OR who are willing/able to travel to L.A. at their own expense if chosen. Please read carefully before responding:

Casting Call "Gay Marriage aka Marry Me" Video Shoot

Always grindin' and my mind is always going thinking of other ways to get out a positive message. I'm in the process of planning my next video shoot for "Marry Me aka Gay Marriage". A video advocating Gay Marriage. The song is featured on my profile off my latest Album "The Movement" so please take a listen. We will be shooting the video in the city of Burbank, California. We are looking to shoot Sept. or October, but will get back to you with exact dates. Please have transportation to arrive on set.

I am looking for a woman to play my wife in the video. The shots will be tasteful but you have to be willing to get close with me and not be shy to be in front of the camera, on camera kissing and affection. Any race, age, etc are all welcomed! I will consider all!

We are still in the planning stages as far as getting the concepts and actual dates set with the Director but it is a go.

My reasoning for picking this video is because of election year and being an advocate for Gay Marriage making it legal and making it stick not just in California but everywhere!

Thank you for wanting to be a part of "The Movement"

Melange Lavonne

Contact: www. myspace. com/melangelavonne
e-mail: melangelavonne@aol.com

Tell Melange that Arlan sent you and she'll pay special attention...

This is Melange's video for "Gay Bash:"

Hot.

This Touched Me...and Not in the Way Christina Applegate Usually "Touches" Me

I've often said "thank god Christina Applegate is alive." I just mean it in a different way this time. This is going to help so many women I think...



"Applegate calls double mastectomy a `tough' choice
Tue Aug 19, 6:18 AM PDT<--from Yahoo News

Christina Applegate is taking the long view of her battle with breast cancer -- the really long view.

Speaking on ABC News' "Good Morning America" in her first interview since announcing her diagnosis earlier this month, the "Samantha Who?" star said she had a double mastectomy three weeks ago. She'll undergo reconstructive surgery over the next eight months.

"I'm going to have cute boobs 'til I'm 90, so there's that," she joked in the interview, which aired Tuesday. "I'll have the best boobs in the nursing home. I'll be the envy of all the ladies around the bridge table."

The 36-year-old actress elected to remove both breasts even though the disease was contained in one breast. She said she is now cancer-free.

Applegate called the operation a logical decision. Her mother battled breast cancer, and she tested positive for the BRCA1 gene mutation linked to breast and ovarian cancer.

"I just wanted to kind of be rid of it," she said. "So this was the choice I made and it was a tough one."

The experience has been an emotional roller coaster, she said.

"Sometimes, you know, I cry and sometimes I scream and I get really angry and I get really like, you know, into wallowing in self-pity sometimes," she said. "And I think that's -- it's all part of healing, and anyone who's going through it out there, it's OK to cry. It's OK to fall on the ground and just scream if you want to."

The Emmy-nominated "Samantha Who?" star has kept her sense of humor intact.

"I've laughed so much in the last three weeks," she said. "I love living, and I really love my life, and I knew that from this moment on it was only going to be good that was going to be coming. Yeah, I'll face challenges, but you can't get any darker than where I've been. So knowing that in my soul gave me the strength to just say, `I have to get out there and make this a positive.'"

Applegate's cancer was detected early through a doctor-ordered MRI. She said she's starting a program to help women at high risk for breast cancer to meet the costs of an MRI, which is not always covered by insurance.

Applegate is scheduled to appear on a one-hour TV special, "Stand Up to Cancer," to be aired on ABC, CBS and NBC on Sept. 5 to raise funds for cancer research.

She has been nominated for an Emmy and a Golden Globe for the ABC show "Samantha Who?", in which she plays a woman who wakes from a coma with no memory of who she is."

She's freakin' AWESOME...and this clip proves it once again:

Jukebox Hero...

Visit my personal profile on myspace and let me know what you think of my current profile song...just added it...

myspace.com/thisismyinterlude

Talk. About. Lesbian. Sex.

http://www.digiromp.com
-"The first lesbian social network for sharing erotic experiences..."

I'm starting this post by wiping a lone tear from mine right eye. But this is not a tear born out of sadness. Nay, this tear comes from a special place deep in my heart that's reserved for only a few things. Things like:

-bubbles being blown into the wind on a beach in the middle of a work day
-strawberries dipped in chocolate and twirled atop my lover's skin
-the dewy smell of the morning air after rain has made love to the cement the night before
-the site of my wife Katharine Mcphee bent over an office desk while wearing fishnet stockings and holding the riding crop I bought her...

Ahem.

Now you may add one more thing to that list: A hot/intelligent bitch who likes to talk about hot lesbian sex on video and homotextually wanting to create an entire website devoted to it. And then like...doing just that. I'm totally in love.

I just discovered this new site by Jincey...

Find more videos like this on DigiRomp: lesbian social network for sharing erotic experiences


Seriously I think our minds should just fuck and get it over with. Cause damn if we're not on the same wavelength when it comes to just about everything lesbian-related. Hmm, I wonder how she feels about role-playing...

Anyhoo! This is what you all MUST do right this moment. All of you who are 18 and over, and a chick, that is. You must join me on Jincey's brand new website community. Sign up for a free profile. Then like...talk to me about SEX on there! Cause we CAN.

My profile is at: http://www.digiromp.com/profile/arlan so add me as a friend!

And even if you don't want to add me, definitely go to the site and have a look around cause it's hot and can only be made hotter by your presence.

Stay tuned to see if I can convince Jincey to marry me before she becomes UBER famous and wants nothing to do with me and my humble (yet sexy) ways...

If I'm Well, You Can She's Been With Me Now...

Wow...


(My friend Terra's cover of a James Taylor song)

Seriously, what?

Amazing.


She should do a whole album of James Taylor covers.
Don't you think?

If you're in the L.A. area and 21+, come hang out with me at Terra's show at Hotel Cafe at Hollywood & Cahuenga tonight (Saturday) at 9pm.

I'm FIFTY!

For years I've been fascinated by the fact that Madonna, Michael Jackson and Prince were ALL born between June and August of the SAME year! Isn't that freaky?



Prince turned 50 a couple of months ago, Madonna turned 50 yesterday and Michael will turn 50 in a couple of weeks. Not only that, but they were all born within like 500 miles of each other.

Madonna. Prince. Michael Jackson.

Chew on that.

Seriously...

Seriously.


(8-15-08 Regis & Kelly)

I Wanna Hang Out With You

I've been bringing you your daily dose of lesbian and lesbian-friendly for the past 2+ years. Now I want to meet you guys in person and get to know the boobs faces behind the names. If you'd like for me to come to your titty city and hang out, *demand it* below and I'll see what I can do! But remember, you may be demanding things now, but I'm the top in this relationship, biotch.






View the complete arlan tour schedule

My Favorite Commercial Right Now...

True.

Help a Lesbian Artist Perform at the Democratic Convention!

Out lesbian rocker Otep Shamaya (our friend and INTERLUDE columnist), and her band OT3P beat out 3000 other bands to make it to the Top 3 finals of the Rock the Vote band contest. The artist that gets the most votes out of the Top 3 will get to perform at the Rock the Vote party at the Democratic National Convention later this month.

We have until this Sunday night to vote for her and help her make some history. I know she'd be super excited to have the support of our community behind her, and we'd be super excited to help.

All you have to do is go to http://www.myspace.com/rockthevote , vote for Otep, and enter your email at the top left-hand side of the page. You have the option of receiving emails from Rock the Vote or not. I chose not to cause I just wanted to check out the website and get information that way.

Penelope Cruz Would Go Gay For... Well Any Hot Blonde, Really.

I'm totally going to see "Tropic Thunder" sometime this week so I can see Robert Downey, Jr's portrayal of a white Australian's portrayal of a black American. Some peeps are boycotting the movie, but I want to see it before I judge it. And uh, it looks funny. So I'll check it out.

And since I'll already be at the theater and, ya know, hangin out, I might just stop by a screening of Vicky Christina Barcelona. It's not a big deal, It just has Penelope Cruz and Scarlett Johansen in a BISEXUAL SEX ROMP THREESOME SEX FUELED ORGY. No biggie.


Penelope loves her some lesbian-friendly shiz, doesn't she? You might remember a few years ago the movie "Head in the Clouds" where she once again showed her impeccable taste by snogging Charlize Theron:


And then of course a few months ago when she and bff Selma Hayek had a field day with the press by ackin all gay and shiz in public. That was cute...but who knew about this?? It gets really interesting at around the 3min mark...


You're welcome.

So You Think You Might Be Gay? Go See "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2" and Find Out.

I saw "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2" today, and it dawned on me that this is the perfect movie to watch if you're questioning your sexuality and need a little help. Here are some surefire ways to tell if you're a homosexual lesbian once you've seen the movie:

10. You recognize the actress who plays Alexis Bledel's little sister as "that hot chick's hot little sister from Bionic Woman" and proceed to undress her with your eyes even when she's not on screen.


9. When Amber Tamblyn's character says a line with the words "the 'l' word,"--meant to describe "love,"--this image instantly pops in your head:

But to be fair, this image pops in your head when you order your popcorn too.

8. You wear your signed "Ugly Betty" underwear to the theater and giggle at your little secret each time America is on screen. She sure cleans up good. Damn.

7. The first time Alison Folland is on screen, you jump out of your chair and scream : "All Over Me!!!" and then miss 5 minutes of the movie because of distracting flashbacks of this hot Leisha Hailey scene:


**UPDATE 2010! If this clip turns you on right now, you are a lesbian. Don't even have to finish this list. You are welcome.

6. You know who Alison Folland is.


5. You hear moaning in the audience at least twice during the movie, and when you look around to see where it's coming from, you realize it's you.


4. You applaud every single time Blake Lively is on screen. I did, and I'm SO gay.


3. Once the credits start rolling, you sit in the theater hoping that instead of bloopers or pics of the cast when they were in high school, they'll show the deleted orgy scene.

2. Once you realize there is no deleted orgy scene, you immediately add one to the script you've been writing: "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 3: Bitches Stranded on an island in Greece Get Buck Wild."

1. You're watching "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2"

Lesbian.

It's Official: Terra Naomi Would Go Gay For Us.

To celebrate the release of INTERLUDE and her interview with Missy Higgins, Terra's been posting love songs to girls on her youtube page and linking people to my site. That's a true friend:-)

And uh...she's gone completely gay here...haha I've watched it 3 times in a row and it's still amazing:


And here's the one she did yesterday:


www. myspace. com/terranaomi

The Best 7.5 Minutes of the Year

Maybe not quite...but damn, it's close:

(Support the filmmakers and rent or buy "After Sex" today!)

Seriously. Thank the sweet Lord for that. And thank this reader for having the sense to send this to me. All other readers, you're slackin. But I forgive you:-)

Um...and also, DAMN.

Another reason Ashton Kutcher gets my *honorary lesbian* award. You know he's the one that introduced these two crazy kids in the first place. Then I'm imagining (more than you know) that the two actresses went over the script while sharing a bottle of red wine one night. They remarked about the complexity of the material and how happy they were to be given some challenging work instead of your average girl-next-door role again. They then giggled. They then, did it. Method actors, you see.

Her She's Kisses...

First of all, gotta tell you that my girl, reader
Donyatta is the newest wind beneath my wings for letting me know about this web series. I'm sure a lot of you have already heard about it because it's been making the rounds at black gay pride events and gaining popularity online in the past few weeks. For those of you who are being introduced to this today, I say pop some popcorn, put on a bib, and let's do this.

They have disabled embedding for the vids, but they're all available on youtube (by the production company!) so start here, and follow the links to other videos to continue watching the series. When you're finished, come back and join me...

Yep. You weren't dreaming. That was a full 3-minute lesbian sex montage; my favorite kind of montage. And uh, I'd like to holler at this young lady:

As the young man who stands outside of the Blockbuster near my house always says to me when I'm obviously not interested or amused, "what's your name? can I get your number?" *sexy raised eyebrow and pursed lip move*

No seriously. Can I have it? Can I have it? Where's your boyfriend? Is he here? Can I have it?

Also, can someone from the cast/crew tell me how I can get my hands on this poster:

It's dreamy.

Click here to go to the main site and get lots of information, pick up a DVD (!!) or a shirt, and talk with the cast.

If you go to this page and scroll down to the bottom, there's a list of non-paid crew jobs that are available (I think in Florida?). If you're down there at Full Sail or just think you have it takes to help the production out and get to hang with some hot lesbians, check it out.

Lesbian After School Special?

Yeah it's special alright.

Is this the week for 15-year-old lesbians, or what??

First a couple of my brave, articulate readers were on Fox talking about being out at school at 15, and today I get this cool vid from a couple more 15-year-old readers. Is 15 the new 30?? Naw, I think 15 is cooler than 30.

So yeah, these chicks (and that one dude) put together this vid. There are some spots where the music makes it hard to hear the dialogue, and I don't know what the eff is goin' on at around 3mins, but I give it a strong A grade! Juno-kudos, lasses. Get it, "lass..." for their way of saying Lesbian. After. School. Special.


Because of their age, I didn't feel comfortable giving out their myspace urls (but you're smart cookies)...so if you want to leave them a comment and/or leave your myspace/facebook url, do it here and I'll be sure to tell them to read it.

p.s. the stalking, mountain dew stuff makes me giggle.

I'm a "Cho Show" Hoe

Margaret Cho just posted this long trailer for her new VH1 show "Cho Show" in a myspace bulletin. It looks SO good. I can't wait!



The show premieres on August 21st. I was thinking of doing something really cool and having a national date night, where a bunch of us all watch the show together...but from our own homes around the country:-) I'm trying to figure out how to do that since there are all the different time zones and it'll be airing at least 3 times that night. We'll make it work though! Send me a message if you'd be interested in doing that. We could like all get on webcam and in a chatroom together. Then of course, it would end like all of my date nights end...massive orgy.

Yes. Yes, indeed. Leave a comment if you'd be into doing that (minus the orgy)!

Remember, you can order the premiere issue of my new lezzy-friendly magazine INTERLUDE right now with this amazing Margaret cover:

Jenny Shimizu's Top 10 Reasons to See "Itty Bitty Titty Committee"

I've been talking about Jamie Babbit's latest lesbian-friendly flick for over a year now, and some of you still don't understand the hotness that is *montage sex* in the film. In fact, I made a Top 10 list about it last Fall and I do believe the #1 reason to see the movie was montage sex!

In this new video, Jenny Shimizu has added her own reasons...and I guess she should know since she was in the film. My invitation to star in the movie was lost in the mail. It's ok though, ladies. No hard feelings. The slight is nothing a few cast lap dances can't fix.



Click here if you want to pre-order the DVD and get the free shirt they mention in the vid.