I Call 'Dibs!'

Ok so after I picked myself up off of the floor after seeing this picture for the first time just now (try to guess what words I searched on google), I wrote a poem. Wanna hear it?

Ahem...

Dear Joss Stone,
Please marry me.
Real hard.
And soon.
And all over my body.
Thank you,
Thank you.
/fin

...and thank sweet Baby Heysuus for THAT!!

Suck My Kiss!

I know I'm a few months late, but can we PLEEEEEASE figure out a way to protest like THIS soon??

Ask Arlan...

Earlier today, Michelle Branch asked her twitter followers to send her questions, and she'd answer 10 of them. I know that I am not Michelle Branch (although we are often times mistaken for each other at the airport) but I was inspired by this. So I asked my facebook peeps to send in some questions, and told them I'd answer honestly. I've enjoyed this SO much today...here are some highlights so far:

A submission from Twitter: Question: @Sharo9 "ur type of girl"? :D

My answer: Sharp sense of humor, unselfish, clever, feminine, kind, silly & Physically:
http://tiny.cc/arlanstype

Stella asked: "r u sexually attracted to me? "

My answer: YES.

Sara asked:
"Why are women so afraid of commitment When they know you're the very best?"

My answer: I don't know if humans were made for monogamy. I wonder about that almost every day. OR maybe its just a woman's natural instinct to run from something that'll make them truly happy, because then they'll have no chaos to keep them occupied.

Sarah asked:
"When are you coming to Phoenix?"

My answer: I was in Phoenix on Oct 19th I believe. I liked it. I'd love to come back within the next 3 months.

C. asked: "I just got a call from Suicide girls...any advice?"

My answer: Ive worked with them in the past as an interviewer (Otep, Missy Higgins, Girl in a Coma, Lola Ray). The experience I had working with them was awesome. I've heard the old rumors of them not treating people who model for them as well as they could...although I think any of those problems have been squashed.

I'd have to know more about why they called you, and your situation to have a better answer for you:-)

Valerie asked:
"in your opinion, what part of the country has the most/least attractive lesbians? honest."

My answer:
Well I haven't been EVERYwhere...and beauty is in the eye of the beholder...but I said I'd be honest. So...I think I've seen the least attractive lesbians in...lets see...maybe Memphis? And the most attractive, hands down: Los Angeles. But this is all about MY type, yall...so hope I didnt hurt any feelings. Also, if you live in Memphis and would like to prove me wrong, please do! haha

Monica asked:
"Who is the most famous person you have ever met?"

My answer:
I'm not sure who would be considered the "most" famous. Maybe Janet Jackson? I met her in Germany a few years ago. I've met Pink and Roseanne, Paris Hilton (haha) and Missy Higgins...L Word peeps...I guess it all depends on who you consider to be more famous.

anonymous asked:
"what would you do if you were in love with someone 20 years older than you (and some extra info I wont reveal here to protect his/her identity)?? Because I'm having a tough time finding an answer!!"

My answer:
Well you asked what I would do...and personally, I would always keep that person in my heart, but I would ultimately have to move on to someone who was within 7 or so years of my age. I'm 29, and I think the only woman who is 20+ years older than me that I'd truly date is Ellen. But she won't have me:-) So other than that, I'd want to be with someone who could share the same life experiences with me at the same time. ...

Things may be great now...cause sex can be a powerful thing. 25 and 45 could be hot now, but what happens when you're 40 and she's 60? It's different.

Again, I know there are lots of people who would disagree with me. I've had this conversation with many of my friends before who have disagreed. But this is my honest opinion as of today:-)

Tashia asked:
"What song has been in your head all day?"

My answer:
Most definitely "Use Somebody" ...both the Kings of Leon version and the Paramore version. Also "Sweet Dream" by Beyonce. Both have been in my head for about a month.

Lacey asked:
"What was your worst sexual experience ever? best?"

My answer:
O-M-G. haha...well, I will answer the "best" question. Thankfully I've had a lot of good and great sex so my answer could change tomorrow if you asked. But the one I'm thinking about right now is with an ex-girlfriend. I wont go into detail, but she was very experimental and free...a free spirit, if you will:-) She understood what turned me on mentally, and was pretty wild physically. I think this particular time lasted 17 hours all tolled. Yep.

Did it just get hot in here all of a sudden? Next question...haha

Brittany asked:
"How old were you when you came out?"

My answer:
I was 16 when I came out to most of the important people in my life...but it wasnt until I was in my mid 20s that I was able to come out to my brother. Wish I had done it sooner!

anonymous asked:
"my dad kicked me out...because he doesnt agree with me bein gay! He thinks i choose to be gay... I want to build my relationship with my father but it isnt workin... What do i do? What can i do? He is the ONLY parent that i have left!"

My answer:
Kris, Im really glad you asked me this. I dont think I'm equiped to give you the best answer possible, so I want you to get in touch with my friends at The Trevor Project. They'll be able to help you much better than I could! http://www.thetrevorproject.org
You can call them or write to them...as soon as you wanted.

Carolyn asked:
"Isn't my son the cutest kid ever? feel free to lie :)"

My answer:
Yes, besides my 5 nieces and nephews who are truly the cutest human beings on this earth, your son is the cutest kid ever:-)

C. asked:
"i absolutely do not understand why lesbians hit their partners, or why their partners make excuses 4 that behavior. Do u have a resource that u reccomend (maybe a website) that could shed light on that subject & give advise that concerned friends could follow? This is the second friend now 2 confide in me & i have no idea what 2 say but 2 tell them 2 run & dont look back..."

My answer:
I don't know why either...I dont think we'll ever really know *why* things like this happen. Last year, I introduced lesbian rapper Melange Lavonne to the producers at Power UP, and they created an amazing video about this subject. You can see it here:


And here's a great list of organizations that can help...few and far between, but they DO exist:
http://lesbianlife.about.com/od/lesbianhealth/a/DVResources.htm

Fiona asked:
"Are you going to come to Adelaide? Want to go out for a drink if you do?"

My answer:
When I was a senior in high school, I visited Adelaide a couple of times for a few weeks each. I loooved it there! Would love to come back one day. Shooting for 2010. And if I do, i would absolutely LOVE to have a drink with you. Absolutely.

"Where Do I Know Her From?" -dude on Sex Rehab "Heaven?? My Dreams??" -chick on Sex Rehab

If you think or know you have an addiction to something, please know that you're not alone and there is help. You can write to me at interludemagazine@yahoo.com if you're having trouble finding the specific websites/organizations on your own and I'll try to send you in the right direction.



Last year I wrote a myspace blog talking about addiction. I asked you guys to write to me privately (or publicly if you were cool with it) about any addictions you had. The response was OVERWHELMING. Before I wrote that, I had no idea so many of my readers had serious addictions. They ranged from severe drug habits, to alcoholism, to cutting, to anorexia...EVERYTHING. It was heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time...because so many of you were winning the battle:-)

At the time, I didn't hear much from people who had sex addiction (or the love/fantasy addiction associated), but I figured it was out there. Lurking. And the reason even people who were comfortable enough to tell me about cocaine benders or cutting themselves weren't able to admit to having sex/love addiction? I think it has to do with it being less understood, and more of a taboo thing. If you feel like you're the only person going through this, or if the people going through it are the guys who wear trench coats and visit sex stores at 2 oclock in the afternoon, then you're not going to raise your hand when someone asks who's the sex addict in the room.

This is why I love "Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew" so much. It shows you some of the different (and more relatable) faces of this disease. Ok so I know this is a reality show on VH1, but I'm not kidding when I say that it's one of the best things on television right now. Or ever, maybe. I guess it depends on if you get anything out of it. I think 90% of the people who watch this won't get anything from it, because they're not dealing with an addiction and find it hard to relate. But for the 10% who suffer from some form of addiction or another (me included), this show is really profound.

Unfortunately, the majority of the show revolves around this chick named Kari Ann. Its obvious that she's not just some brat who wants attention. She's probably the sickest of them all...and is obviously on some sort of drugs that shes not telling anyone about. But it takes away from the more compelling stories. I'm especially interested in Amber Smith (#4), Kendra Jade Rossi (#2), and Duncan Roy (#3).

This is the full length version of Episode 3. You can see the first two episodes on the VH1 website, but you dont really have to watch those first to understand whats happening in this one. Again, Kari Ann's whole deal is annoying right now, but try to watch the whole episode. It's amazing.

"Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew" airs Sunday nights on VH1:

VH1 TV Shows | Music Videos | Celebrity Photos | News & Gossip

NOTE: "Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew" is not to be confused with "Sex Therapy with Robin Thicke" ;-)


Mmmm...hmmmm!

Cause There's Tape on Her Boobs, and I Ain't Mad at Her.

(Sam Vitez of Rough Duchess - facebook.com/roughduchessband)

I've been keeping a pretty tight secret for a while now, and I am ready to unveil it right here, right now. You may want to sit down and brace yourself (and open your legs, if you feel so inclined) because this one's a doozy: I...Arlan Mcphee-Shelley-Stone (think about it), really like girls from England, the English accent, English girls with boobs, and English girls who have tape on their boobs.

So when I found out that my (pretty safe to say 'queer') friend Sam Vitez was not only an English girl in possession of boobs, but also had lots of tape in various colors (or colours) hanging around her house, a camera, and an electronic/dancey group, I had to find out more. Sure, I could have just called her up and said, "Hey Sam, what's this about having a group called 'Rough Duchess' and playing all over LA half naked?" But no, that would be the cowards way out. So I set out on a journey of enlightenment. A journey of self-discovery. A journey...to have an excuse to see Sam's boobs barely covered with tape and a prayer. Oh, and did I mention, she bounces around on stage when she wears said "outfit??"

Here's a little vid Sam did to promote a show this summer back when the group's name was "Lady Disaster," and when Sam had lots more hair than she does now;-)


If you still wonder what my deal with English birds and their accents is, you're speaking crazy talk!

Rough Duchess has just released their first album on itunes! Search for it, mothereffers.

"Under My Skin"


"Inside Plan"

I'm pretty sure if you attempted to dry hump Rough Duchess on Facebook at facebook.com/roughduchessband, they wouldn't stop you!

...And All You Know and How You Speak...

I have to thank my good friend Jessica (aka Jescas) for sending this to me. This song has been one of my favorite thing to listen to lately, and to hear it sung this way...mmm hmm! :-) Hoping to find that *somebod-day* soon! Oh and I ain't gonna lie: I just wiki'd Haley (lead singer) cause she's hot...and I wanted to make sure she wasn't jailbait. Happy to say she's turning 21 at the end of December. I'm sure she'd get along with me and Joss (as in Stone, as in my new wife) very well!