I wanna thank my great friend "Ashley" for letting me borrow her air mattress for th e past 6 weeks or so. It was a great run. The highs were extreme. The lows were...extreme. I laughed. I cried. I slept. I woke up and refilled the air with that loud ass refiller thingy. It was good times. But today my friends, I am a woman. For I have a queen sized bed, with plenty of room for another one or two of you who'd like to join me. And I'm giving away free hugs and free....well...*ahem* I'll tell you all about the other free thing once you've signed the insurance waiver and the motion sickness release forms.
Anyhoo...this weekend, I had so much fun at PRIDE in L.A.! We were filming a Kentucky Lightning short film, and having her run loose at PRIDE and Dykes on Bikes was insane and awesome. You can imagine the reaction she got from people who didn't know her...especially after she started dry humping them by their merch tent;-) Stay tuned for more info on that...
Also, speaking of having plenty of room in my bed, Joss Stone performed as the headliner Saturday night, and I could seriously write an entire blog about her legs alone. Hey-suus, she's gorgeous and talented! And um...British. I've been a fan of her music for years of course, cause that's my jam, but I was not aware of the leg situation until Saturday. Seriously, she wasn't wearing high heels...or any shoes for that matter (hot) and her legs were like Tina Turner's circa 1975. In-SANE.
I want to also mention that whoever that local dude was who was doing the sign language translation during Joss' set should be given an award for most awesome...person...like ever. Cause not only did he sign his ass off, he grooved like a motherfucker. It was bad ASS. And as if I didn't already want to tongue wrastle Ms. Stone and make sweet soulful love to her calf muscles, she completely won me over at the very end when she gave him a rose to show her appreciation.
I officially have a new candidate for a lover for me and my wife Katharine Mcphee:
...um, and also, she talks like this:
I'd also like to add a special message to Joss.
Joss honey, if you're reading this, and I bet you are cause I bet you're just web savvy like that...baby, I know you came over last night and you wanted to get into air mattress with me and when you pulled back the sheets you saw Mcphee's long, luscious legs and you got all jealous and cute and stuff...and you slept on the couch. Let me tell you something, baby. Jossie (cause she lets me call her "Jossie," see) tonight, I'll tell Mcphee to roll over. And we'll make an Arlan sandwich. And the 3 of us will live happily ever after while we watch that scene from Season 3 of L Word when Helena does Dyland at the beach house, and I'll have the two of you reenact it, as I warm up the caramel and find my Brian Mcnight cds in the closet.
...oh, and you're welcome.