Blog Archive

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Southern Comfort...

I live in L.A. now and this town is really getting to me. There are a lot of fake people, inside and out. I'm not used to all the drama that goes on here. I'm not used to people not meaning what they say, or people having a hidden agenda when they get all buddy buddy with you. L.A. is definitely not all bad, but today especially, I've been feeling disheartened by it.

So what do you do when you're down in the dumps and you wanna snap out of it quick like? Watch "Designing Women" of course! Don't act like you've never used it as a remedy (especially if "Golden Girls" isn't on at the time). I just watched this episode that I've seen a hundred and one times, but something Julia said really, really struck me and is helping me right now. I thought I'd make this site even gayer by sharing it with you guys:-)


(The part I'm referring to starts at the 3:20 mark (counting backwards) and goes for about a minute. Get it Julia!)

If you're not able to see the vid cause of a slow connection speed or any other reason, Julia says the following:

"In the end it doesn't matter what anybody else thinks about you. People are gonna forget you about 10 minutes after you die anyway. The point is you have to be exactly who and what you want to be. Most everybody's coasting along on phony public relations. People who say being beautiful or rich or thin makes them happy, people who are trying to make their marriages or their children seem better than they actually are. And for what? Appearances. Appearances don't count for diddly. When its all said and done, all that counts is what was true and truly felt and how we treated one another...and that's it.

Amen, sister. Amen. I just gotta keep thinking that each day, to keep me grounded and sane in this crazy ass town:-)

Oh, and the following scene is my favorite scene from the entire series...because of this scene, I'm making Julia an honorary lesbian right this second. I crown thee *gay*, Julia Sugarbaker!


If you love where you live, let me know. Why do you love it? What's it like there? Should I pack my bags and move there? ;-) Honestly if I could move anywhere right now, I think it would be Brussels or London. yep...

19 comments:

Jaci Layne said...

"In the end it doesn't matter what anybody else thinks about you. People are gonna forget you about 10 minutes after you die anyway. The point is you have to be exactly who and what you want to be. Most everybody's coasting along on phony public relations. People who say being beautiful or rich or thin makes them happy, people who are trying to make their marriages or their children seem better than they actually are. And for what? Appearances. Appearances don't count for diddly. When its all said and done, all that counts is what was true and truly felt and how we treated one another...and that's it.


ABSOLUTLY AMAZING! love that !!! Isnt amazing, how you can watch something 102980 times, and STILL find something that sticks out even more... day by day ? Thanks for this!

Anonymous said...

I love, love, love "Designing Women". It makes me feel good inside when I watch it (Golden Girls too lol). I'm sorry you aren't having such a great time. Hopefully things will start to look up soon. Remember, be true to who you are; no one can take that away from you!

Shaye said...

Does she remind any one else of one Ms. Bette Porter? Is that just me?

Anonymous said...

Shaye, she reminds me of Bette too.

Arlan, I grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area, specifically Silicon Valley, and I love Silicon Valley. I've been to all major areas of the country except the south: Alaska, Hawaii, Seattle (Bangor), San Diego, Illinois (Great Lakes), New England (Groton, CT, all through upstate New York too).

Silicon Valley is just great. It's socially enlightened without being a communist stronghold like SF, it's got a vibrant economy, it has culture, it has a decent public transit system (as long as you're not in the outlying suburbs like me). And yes, it has a thriving LGBT community, with its own San Jose Gay Pride Parade. Plus it has that 24/7 Gay Pride Radio on 106.5 HD Radio that I told you about in email.

You should move to SILICON VALLEY, Arlan!!! Or at least come up to visit me someday. :)

--Brian

Anonymous said...

Arlan, I know exactly where you should live...right here in LA. What you seek, you find. People come here looking for fame and glitter and all that and that's what they find. The people you hate here aren't from here. Ask them. They moved here from the midwest looking to get famous and then used my city like a cheap whore and talked shit about her in the locker room the next day. I grew up here and I ignore all that and the people I know don't give a fuck about the industry and we all enjoy the NATURAL beauty LA has (believe it or not, we have it, and I'm talking about GORGEOUS landscapes among several other things) and I hate to get more sappy than I have already, but I hope you'll join us, because I swear LA is the most amazing, unique, diverse city in the entire world and there's nowhere else like it. So maybe you should come hang with me and I'll show you there are real people and real places to visit all over our city.

arlan said...

@ hollywood marie...

sounds good...how do i find you? :-) myspace page url?

Anonymous said...

Screw California, move up to Oregon! You'll find more Californians here than in California. Just kidding, so all you CA people, just stand down. Seriously, Portland, OR is a nice little town with culture, natural beauty, decent public transportation, and a pretty progressive government. I seem to recall we allowed gay marriages for a split second here in Multnomah County. Yes, it does rain here, but that's what makes it so green and pretty! You should check us out!

Kodiak said...

Arlan...you got me with this one. I found out a friend of mine was a champion baton twirler this summer and all I could think of the whole day was this scene.

I'm glad you feel the Sugarbakin', too.

K.

Second Runner Up -- That Christmas special where Dolly Parton makes a guest appearance. Ahh, the hard candy...

Sarah said...

few things are better than designing women. and i totally remember that episode. it's the one where suzanne goes to that thing right, and uh...she won that pageant and now she's gained some weight and she's older and they're all talking shit about her?

i miss designing women. and golden girls. we need more shows like that back on tv. you know?

i miss blossom too. you know i should just start a blog ALL about tv. that would be so fun and easy for me.

Unknown said...

come to seattle! At least come visit it is so amazing here. Very open for the most part, great people, the rain is a little dull but you get use to it i swear and Capitol Hill the best place in seattle, it is a all around great place!

Anonymous said...

those two scenes of dw are my favorite...and I think more people should see it and maybe they will learn how not to judge others at all, let alone quickly...I live in n.y. and I have to say about everything is cool here..execpt the summers of course and the reason you should move here is because it is not just a quote but a fact that it is " THE CAPITOL OF THE WORLD" not to mention one of the most polite places to live and just as cultural if not more then l.a. but thats just my opinion...I'm a die hard new yourker with a hell of alot of home pride.

Anonymous said...

Hey Arlan,

I love Designing Women!!! And thanks so much for putting those videos on b/c I think everybody needs to listen that message. When I moved to CA (SF Bay Area) I even felt people were putting on appearances there, and I heard it was worse in LA. But most of the people who lived in SF weren't even from there and lot of them were taking advantage of the dot com industry. Now I'm back on the east coast, and I'll have to say that if I were to move back west, it would be Vancouver, British Columbia in Canada!!! The people were soooo nice, and it's a beautiful country!

Also if you want to move abroad, especially London, let me know b/c something's (I heard they have awesome dance clubs, the accent, natural beauty, etc) pulling me there. I know that I would definitely love to visit the UK!

Anonymous said...

Arlan, I grew up in South-east Asia, spent my teenage years in Sydney, Australia, and have recently moved to London to live and work here for a few years like many Antipodeans do.

I've only been here a few weeks, but I've started to fall in love with London. There's just so many things to do and see here and although it does get a little bit scary here sometimes, you can't help but feel like you're in the centre of the world.

I still think of Sydney as home sweet home though. Both Sydney and London are my dream cities as both are very gay, and I do hope to one day see the original gay metropolis of San Francisco. It's my rainbow pilgrimage :)

I visit your blog at least twice a week to read something lesbian-y as a way to reassure myself that there are lots of us out there in the world(it ain't just a fairytale!) and we're not invisible or camera-shy or boring or sexless or humourless :)

Listen to London calling. You'll know you'll love it here :D

Anonymous said...

Hey, Arlan! What's up with the away message on your myspace? I wanted to email you, but it obviously wouldn't let me, and I don't want my info all up in your blog or myspace comments (I like my privacy)...any ideas?

Anonymous said...

Oh, I just found your other myspace page and emailed you there. Yay!

Anonymous said...

Julia/Mary Jo = OTP, no? :) Indeed, a proto Bette and Tina too!

Edilma said...

God I loved that show (yes we did get it here in south america hahaha). Thank you for posting this!

Wow I should have known i was gay back then, I had a huge crush on Julia and neve realized it hahahaha.

And yes she does remind me a little bit of Bette.

Anonymous said...

oh my goddess, I totally forgot how much I watched that show. I remember that episode like it happened to me once long ago. Especially the ice cream scene. i remember thinking how cool it would be to get a tub of ice cream that big..... No wonder i'm sooo gay...

Unknown said...

hey there girl,I live in the great state of south carolina,you have the mountains on one side and the beach on the other, I'm surrounded bye the grat states of NC, GA, and VA. its awsome to see the mountains in the early morning dew of the sun light from my house so if your looking try and eye full of SC, we would love to have ya. yall be good now.