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Wednesday, March 28, 2007

snow white and cinderella should SO hook up.

on st. patty's day i met a dude who drives the monorail at disney land. he was a friend of my old roommate's and he came down to san diego to celebrate the holiday. i had never met him and will probably never see him again. but i swear to you, the minute someone mentioned his job to me (to a group of us really), i went nuts. it was as if Elmo himself had just walked through the door. or like, mr. fuckin rogers.

i was in a room full of 20something year olds, but i couldnt help but act a fool. wouldnt you have done the same thing?? i kept asking him questions like i was interviewing him for my magazine. he just wanted to drink some green beer, but i wanted to know how the monorail's steering wheel felt between his manly hands. how does having that much power, feel?? i asked him if he could take me for a ride. it was the first time id ever asked that of a man before. and though it felt foreign and naughty, it felt right. so...so very right.

the man drives the fucking MONORAIL at fucking DISNEY LAND people! thats one of the coolest jobs i can imagine. aaand...ive had lots of jobs. i used to be an usher for concerts in Dallas at the big arenas and outdoor venues. i worked at a movie theater, a bank, a pizza place...i mean, ive SEEN things. but driving the monorail. whew. and did i feel like a dork when i started singing the monorail song from The Simpsons in front of him and moving my hands around? sure. did i seem like a dork when i asked to ride along with him one day and totally brushed off his offer to get me into the park for free? probably. but am i the only one in this blog that can say she was 2 feet away from someone who drives the monorail at Disney Land, has done security at a Stone Temple Pilots show AND has the belly of the pilsbury dough boy?? ABSOLUTELY!

i say all of this to tell you that i have absolutely NO fucking idea whats going on in this video, but its Disney-related. i can only assume (and hope to god) that its some sort of college film project. so if youve ever fantasized about gettin jiggy with it on the Tea Cups ride or callin' out your girls name while she goes down on you in front of Snow White at the opening parade...well i guess this is your cup...of...tea:

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Okay Arlan,

I might have never wanted my girl to go down on me in front of Snow White at the opening parade, and everyone I know (including my mother) calls me a dork, a cute dork, but a dork all the same... That was I believe the hottest video you have posted to date. I mean, yeah the Hungarian porno chicks are nice to watch, but you can tell that they are being paid to fuck on tv. These are 2 real lezzy hotties making out to fucking Disney. Thank you Arlan for making my day.-- Miriam

Anonymous said...

I used to date a girl who worked at Disneyland. One of her favorite stories to tell was the time she was in the tunnels below the park, turned a corner to see Belle and Jasmine in a very passionate liplock. Luckily for them she was a lesbian and all she did was wink at them, go around them, and continue on her way. She siad she would have preferred to stay and watch but she had places she needed to be.

Ali said...

Soooo. That was weird.

The Promo Homo said...

All I have to say is...

YES.

I took my friends to DL a week ago or so... and all i did was sing the Monorail song from the Simpons all day whenever we rode it, talked about it, or I saw it go by.... and she didn't know the episode or the song... totally ruined it. My friend who works at Disney didn't know it either.

So now that someone else has done this. I feel a LOT better. Thank you for that.

Anonymous said...

hehe..i totally lol'd through this whooooole thing...that pretty much made my day hearing "darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me"...hehe..*giggle giggle* Thanks :)

Cate Ryley said...

Hah, well as one of the girls in the video from sloth films it was pretty funny to realize we were getting a bunch of hits from being linked from this blog. Thanks for that, glad people liked it and laughed at the disney, heh.
Chelsea (the redhead)

Anonymous said...

this video...it worried me lol but it was a laugh and like panda said, i loved the "darling its better down where its wetter take it from me" :) hehehe hell yeah!!

Anonymous said...

It must sound totally dorky, but I loved this and thought it was brilliant how they expressed their emotions through Disney lyrics. The "down where it's wetter" line cracked me up, of course. And I must say that I've teared up while watching Mulan before, while she's singing that song, so hearing those lines early on got me involved right away. Pretty piece of work, it was.