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Thursday, October 18, 2007

We're Not Gonna Get Them.


Back in June I told you guys about a movie those adorable T.A.T.U. angels and their spunky friend Mischa Barton were putting together. I now have in my hands...er...blog post...a "preview" of said movie.

My guess is that 99% of those of you who watch this will be like, "what?" and "who?" and "do what now?" Some of you might escalate that to a "what in the holy hell??"

But before you freak out, let me tell you why I'm gonna buy the dvd of this from a street vendor named "Bebo" out of the back of his Impala one day after it hits theaters go see this at the theater the first day it comes out:

A. At some point during what I'm going to assume will be 70 mins of film, Mischa Barton and the other chick are going to do it. If I can sit through "Wild Things 2 through 4" just for wet breasts shots and straight girls making out, I can sit through some snazzy music scenes with fire breathers for the same.

B. Mischa Barton's got nads. And I don't mean these kind. I mean, she's got moxy to make something that looks this bad and allegedly has a really weird premise and creepy dialogue.

C. Mischa's wearing a hair net. Well duh! Reason enough. This really should be A.

D. A little movie they call "Man in the Mirror: The Michael Jackson Story," which was an unauthorized bio that aired on VH1 in 2004. I like to call this movie, "heaven." You know why? Well first look at this picture from it: click. I tried to find vid of it, but *someone* has made it disappear off of the internet. That someone is probably either Michael himself, or Myspace's Tom. Or Oprah! She probably did it. Aaaaanywayz, the point is, that movie was by far the worst piece of shit I think I've ever witnessed on television. But because it was so terribly bad & wrong, it made me laugh and laugh for days. I will never be able to hear phrases like "Shut up, Tink!" without giggling wholeheartedly. The vision of their Elizabeth Taylor flopping down onto Mike's bed while wearing a track suit and diamonds will forever be burned into my memory. I want to relive a joy like that with this T.A.T.U. movie.

So I say, bring it ON!!!

10 comments:

Crystal said...

im down

Anonymous said...

i second that

Anonymous said...

Well that was sufficiently boring enough to ensure that i never watch it

Celina said...

Girls gonna get typecasted for liking to kiss other girls. I see anything Barton is in. I'm a lame ass like that.

Anonymous said...

I've seen Lost and Delirious.....and the O.C...so I will definately watch this...Barton is sexy...Plus T.A.T.U is fucking awesome....hell yeah

Anonymous said...

I dunno, terrible acting, semi-clad women, depressed/repressed gay women...it has all the makings of a lesbian cult classic.

Britta said...

I'm going to have to say it...

What in the holy hell??

It also seems that Mischa just likes to kiss girls.

Ash Z. said...

I love t.A.T.u. and I adore Mischa Barton. Hands down, I am going to go see this movie. I have been waiting for months for it to finally get some clips out! =]

Anonymous said...

il def watch this movie. i love tatu and michsa she was the one who made the oc what it was. i love her in every movie she kisses a girl lol

Sarah said...

oh man, i keep forgetting about that michael jackson movie. i need to get that on dvd, arlan, and come back out there so we can watch it. all day. that was one of the best times of my life, seeing that bullshit. several times.

it has to be on the internet somewhere!